cinderellathefatwhore-thatswhatiam

2006-10-18T03:30:00.000-07:00

oh great my results are out.i passed everything except maths.nothing new i guess.but i think i was kinda disappointed wif all my marks.never mind.i will harder next year.AND PROVE TO HER I CAN DO WELL.
i think im going to have an interesting holiday to look forward too.maybe i'll highlight my hair,and pluck my eyebrows,and buy coloured contacts,and i need to SLIM DOWN.im full of fats and i eat too much carbs.so from now on its gonna be a total fruit and water diet for me.yes i need to remove my fats from my already fat body.
and you know i think im handling the situation perfectly.im so not thinking about her anymore.i rely mess and think less about her.and its good.i think i dont hurt so much that way,cos theres nothin good to look forward to.but then again,sometimes i think im just hurting myself even more by keeping myself in from her and the others.but doesnt care aymore so whats the point in something that goes one way huh?doesnt make sense.
anyway,here i go,the accident prone-no CG girl,my left ankle's ruined again.i feel during ballet,Nathan and i were trying out step ups for the dance,and we were doing okaye until some other guy came out into the wrong stage and wrong timing,and he fell with me over him and i couldnt let myself step onto his head so i tried to avoid it but his hand swung out and hit my ankle off balance and now its totally crooked.yucks.you know what this means?NO MORE skating,urghh!love of my life.and no more chinese dance.miss tan says i've to be prepared not to take part in SYF.i cant accept it.i just cant.
oh and anyone heard the song 'angels brought me here'?its a beautiful song.try it.

2006-10-12T07:51:00.000-07:00

give me a freaking break.
good things and intentions are NEVER repaid.
i went over to my mum's centre to help out today wif dance and making of the props for the concert.and all the little ones were uber hungry and tired.so my jie jie asked me to pour 3/4 cup horlicks for them.and that was EXACTLY what i did.and then my stupid grandmother working there started screaming at me when i asked her for more drink for them since it was finished.and she just started screaming at me for everything.WHY?WHY?I CANNOT understand what i did wrong.i cannot.i was just helping out.thats just it.and jie jie was like''next time round you dont help to serve la hoh?haha.''right.maybe it was a joke but it hurts okaye.
nothin i do ever pleases anyone.im just the uber dyke.
today's rehearsel was fone.whatever la.im just so totally in no mood.leave me ALONE.

2006-10-10T07:56:00.000-07:00

yipee yah yah.yippee yippee yah!!i am so goddamn drop dead relieved.happy ecstatic.WHATEVER.the horrid sickening,out to kill me exams are so over!!!finally god i thought this day wouldnt come.yes and now im over at my jie jie's house having a sleepover.and i finally went SKATING today.oh god the ice felt so good.heehee.i so totally missed it.
anyway tomorrow pl,xy and i are off to bugis is it?or is it tampanis?argh.however you spell it.anyway,i hope its fun.=)
fri's grad day for all the sec 4's and 5's.and im doing emcee.like why?everyones totally sick of my face.get someone else tht looks fresher la.oh whatever.and i haven even got my script yet.hmm see.again.last minute work.never mind,i'll just do what i can.
sat-8 to 11.im going off to is it jurong primary to market fuhua.they want us to write something abt how fuhua has been a special place to me.any ideas anybody?help?
and mum and dad are going to malaysia on fri.i don get to go.its okaye.i'll find better things to do.
and the best thing of all im totally looking forward too is my trip to the USA in dec.oh god.i so totally waited my whole life for this.we'll be going there from the 17 to the 27 i think.and it'll be snowing there.we'll go to los angeles first,then denver where we'll spend christmas at a ski lodge.yayness:] and then back to somewhere and then back home.i think i'll get to see my cousins there.all boys so yucks.but its worth the trip.anyway i think thats abt it.todlee loo.

2006-09-25T07:57:00.000-07:00

its thurs,and im bloody sick of my life.its the total pits.u know what?whats the POINT in studying when u get nothing out of it.i put in the effort to strudy and yet nobody recognises it,i still fail.and NOBODY cares.
i know nobody cares.
we had 4 tests today and okaye la,i bet i failed EVERY SINGLE one of them again.but whats new huh?im the useless bitch born to fail in life.dont bother contradicting me.i know thats who i am.
and u know what squid,maybe i was wrong about you all along.i dont think there was ever you and me as friends,or whatever u think we were.i dont think u care anymore,and i just want to forget you.just like you said.''teachers tend to have the teacher instinct,maybe thats why im distant sometimes.im sorry''
well gues what?u dont have to be.i understand how u feel now,and although it hurts,whatever.who cares?u're just another one of those people whom i loved,and then went and tore my heart up into pieces again.its nothing new to me.im so used to it.im just gonna forget you,forget everything i loved.
like-goodbye to you,goodbye to everything i knew,goodbye to everything i loved.

2006-09-22T05:17:00.000-07:00

i feel kind of lost.i dont know why.i
its like i feel empty and what everyone says,it doesnt hurt anymore.
today i think many people changed they're way of thought on everything that happened.and maybe so did i.i admit that i dont really think kah yan was the one who tagged on my blog cos the language used doesnt really seem like hers.
about my chem file and wb,i dont know.and u know what?i dont want to know.
im sorry if i hurt anyone in school today,i wasn't feeling very happy.
to amanda-hey,im sorry i burst out at you and accused you for thinking it was me who did everything.its just that i felt u were kind of cold towards me as u were whispering things to kah yan.and u kept giving me the cold shoulder.and u didnt share anything with me.and im sorry for saying something hurtful like that if that wasnt really what u were thinking.
i think that i'll follow what xuebing says,leave the matter be.if its done,its done.and i'll just move on.i'll learn to pick myself up and start afresh.theres no point in me brooding on whats already happened.
to everyone out there again who has helped.thanks so much for your help,i couldnt have done it without you.
so,thats about it.this is gonna be my last entry on what has happened.its over,and its time i moved on.

2006-09-21T05:27:00.000-07:00

and today you went and ruined my physics wb.thanks so much for doing that.that was so nice of you and i titally appreciate it.
u know what?u should really try doing somehting like that to yourself.it doesnt feel good.i dont know how you manage to go around acting as if there's nothing wrong.THERE IS SOMEThNG WRONG woman.and u need to start realising u're hurting alot of people.
i really wonder how miss lee feels about all this going on.do u feel angry?sad?disturbed?or does this mean nothing to you really.i mean ya i really want to know.i know i feel like breaking down evrytime something like this happens.i just hold back the falling tears so i can prove to you im stronger than you think.
well guess what?im not gonna let you get to me,you can try as much as you want.but i know the only thing u want to happen is to break people up and to hurt them more.so that everyone doesnt have friends.grow up whoever you are.FIND friends.EARN them.and LOVE them.u dont go around hurting them.u hurt me.u DISGUST ME.im really feel sick when i see you doing such things.

2006-09-20T07:11:00.000-07:00

i've got enough.really,im so sick of going anywhere and seeing tags about me from kah yan.and other people backing me up but getting rude remarks.enough.i've cried for the past 3 hours.my eyes are swollen and teary and im shit tired and demoralised.
i dont know how squid feels and whether she still loves me.its stupid.im easily swayed.
well guess what?i was never strong.so leave me along and get lost.i cant take it anymore.

2006-09-20T04:29:00.000-07:00

you know what?you call me a goddamn whore,well u're not ANY BETTER.i hate you i hate you i HATE YOU.
you could do anything to me but u had to tear my CHEMISTRY FILE.you knew damn well how much that meant to me,how much effort i put in all the time to get it properly packed and decorated.you ruined it into pieces.i hate YOU.
you go to hell and don ever come back.i'll never forgive you.I HATE YOU FOREVER.
urghh.i feel like crying im so infuriated and URGHH!!that its ruined.it was my HARD WORK.on of the things i put effort into.why cant you just leave me alone?go pick on somebody YOUR SIZE.
but to all the friends who accompanied me the whole way,thanks so much.i love ya guys so much.=)

2006-09-18T08:03:00.000-07:00

WHORE-that means a really cheap person.a prostitute maybe.its downgrading.
but sometimes i feel im like that too u know.so dirty inside.
anyway,today was monday-a truly horrid day.i cried,kah yan cried,all because of money?if this is what life has to come too,then id rather not accept it.i cant bring myself to go aropund that someone else although has done wrong is made to do something that she doesnt want just so im made happy.u know what>i'll just suffer thru it,really.everytime i see tears coming from others,i think to myself,how can anything be worth making someone else sad.it doesnt make sense does it?
sometimes i think im gonna quit any second cos there're so many things tht are pushing me down,and i cant tell no one cos no would believe me.
but thank u so much 2 all those people who have kept me strong thru all this-linda,i love babe.u rescue me all the time u power woman.pei ling,jie,theres no one else in this world that can replace you and everything u've sacrificed for me.i love you so much n i thank god everyday i have you.amanda-hey lil bimbo queen,no matter how bimboish u get,i'll love you all the way,thank you for always telling me to be strong.xueyy-hey other jie,you too warm my heart so much,thanks for being there for all of us.no matter how ''piao-wy'' you are,i love you too.lay theng-hey lays,thanks for brightening my already sick day by callin me jackass huh?haha.thanks 4 everything.shih joo-thanks for sticking up for me in class,u teach me to stand up for myself.smile babe!=) xiu hui-hey gal,thanks for taggin n helpin too huh?heehee.take care k?sipei-thanks for helpin to keep me strong too!andy-hey dude,u make me laugh out loud everytime i talk to you.u make a difference im my life,you really do.drink more warm water and get your tummy right k?xuebin-hey you!thanks for supporting me in school while i nag all day long.take cares.and to all the others ive forgotten to include,thank you everyone of you so so so much.i love ya guys from e bottom of my heart<3
and to kah yan-hey,i don know whether everything u've said abt me in my tagboard was written by you.and if it is,whether u truly feel that way about me.im sorry i seem so hateful like a dirty whore to you.but i really never wanted things to turn out this way.why did u have to be so mean?but thank u for teaching me an important lesson along the way.that i have many important ffriends in my life supporting me all the way,and that i will never take them for granted the way u have.u dont know how nice it is to have people beside you,to walk you thru.i hope you learn to feel that one day,and maybe then u'll learn what love is.till then.good luck and take care of yourself.i still cared all along.
and to all those people out there who i've disappointed whether its cos of my horrible self,im sorry. i never meant it that way.
anyway,i saw this quote and it made so much sense so here goes=

let me see in others
not their imperfections
but the good things
that arouse our best affections.
love works in ways
that are wondrous and strange-
there's nothing in life
that love cannot change

i love all you guys.

2006-09-16T07:02:00.000-07:00

'Cause im feeling lost
When im in your arms
The reasons are gone
For why i was holding on to you
I tried so hard
To be the one i dont like who i've become

2006-09-16T06:08:00.000-07:00

kah yan,please please please would you return me the $40.20 you owe me.i really need it cos my mum isn't being nice to me.spare a thought for me ya?its time u learned how to?

2006-09-16T06:04:00.000-07:00

i feel so dirty inside.
and i cut my hair with pl the other day!her hair looks good.and im happy with mine.its shorter and neater.then that stupid ballet teacher wont grumble her head off.ah you happy now mamzelle?eeehhh!!!
really i feel like a total bitch.like i've been torn inside out,like i've been ripped apart by someone.its so dirty.thats the only word i can find.its like i can wash myself a thousand times and i wont feel any cleaner than before.is that what happens?
i'll never wish this on someone else.even if its the person i hate most.

2006-09-16T05:44:00.000-07:00

MY GOD!!its like so soon till the end of years,and even shorter till the end of school for this year!i just realised its like going to be another year gone..and then its like i'll no longer be in fuhua!like oh my god.i cant bear to leave my school.its like my second home of if not first n ive got so many people i love there.i jusr cant.
and god i havent like studied for the exams can?not one subject.its bloddy atrocious.im going to fail everything and disappoint everybody again.not new.urghh.
i was thinking about how i keep my feelings in to my self nowadays so often.i really dont tell ANYBODY.and those who really truly know me,they'll know thats so unlike me.i used to share all my feelings previously so i get people's attention and bla.maybe i try to feel that someone cares.but now i dont want that anymore.cos the things that happen.i just cant share.and sometimes it hurts so bad cos u cant take one step forwward and neither can you take one step back cos its already been done.i dont think i know what trust or love is anymore.not in my list of vocabulary,one i htought i knew so well.
but today i shared something with my mama squid n i hope i did the right thing.we like talked for 2 hours and i cried.AGAIN.fine im blood-yy emotional la okaye?i think i'll miss her to the poop if she doesnt teach us next year,and worst still when i leave.lets not think about it.i can feel the tears already.
is it wrong to share everything with your closest friends?thats somehting i keep on asking myself evryday.i find im not able too.its like now everytime i want to share something wif them something inside me pulls me back and says are you sure thats what you want to do?are gonna do something like what they've done before.and everytime that happens i feel horribl right down to the bone.i feel so dirty,like when u've just got raped or something.its a terrible feeling.i always tell myself,they're you're best friends,shouldn't they know everything that goes on in your life?thats what friends are for right.i know i've been so unfair to them and i feel like ripping my insides out everytime i do that.im sorry.
yes enough.i want to go back to school.i hate the weekends.they're like 2 days in hell for me.and it happens every week.

2006-09-14T08:05:00.000-07:00

today was kinda horrible i had to say.the periods i was having in school were like yucks!english was like comprehension again.i mean ya i understand that miss wong need us to learn the technic of comprehension which im not good in either.but the same compre for ONE WEEK.thats a lil too long doncha think?and then i cant remember what else we had la okay.
then schience,off to the science lab.had ky sitting next to me and victor a few seats away.and pl next to me with xy n wx on the other side.already the lesson started out bad when i went to get the retord stand and then pl had already taken them and i had to re-return it.and then we clamped everything that we were supposed to do.ya fone.clamp here and there,.clamped wrongly so many times and it kept on getting obstructed by the stupid lil piece of metal!like URGH!!great!isn't my day just getting better.and the lab was so darn hot and stuffy and i couldnt breathe properly and what not.and i was getting so irritated cos the rule kept dropping off.like what the hell!!it just has to defy gravity,and ME!SHOO!
okay then we tried using plasticine to stop the thing from dropping off and attached to the cork was this super duper sharp nail or whatever shit u call it la okay.and my finger poked deep into it.i was like OUCH!it hurt so darn bad.and im not supposed to be losing blood cos im stupidly and ridiculouskly anaemic.like whatever.then it started bleeding like hell.and then nice old victor went down and got me a plaster.thanks dude.that was so kind of you really!i didnt expect u to be the one who helped,i was expecting someone else to care ENOUGH.
and then i washed it and bandaged it up,but by the time i got back to class after science period,i ccould feel my finger swellingi told myself never mind,maybe its just the natural thing to happen cos its been aggravated after all.then reading and history.whoah,my whole entire left arm started throbbing like hell and i felt like crying so bad cos it hurt like knivs cutting through it.but still never mind,ignore it.
then we went to junction 8,pei ling,xue ying and i.so long the journey there and i felt really weak and drained there.i have no idea why.so i slept like a pig all the way while the other two read story books.when we got there my arm got a little better and i was like oh yeah baby,thats more like it.see theres nothin wrong.we shopped around.had jap food then macs.like pigs like that,i couldnt finish my food.so wasteful.then we went to get my chocs from de chocolates.the dark chocs there are like wow!i would have prefered my chocs with wone thou but never mind.those will suffice.and i bought this cute box with 2 hearts of chocs in it for mama squid.maybe i'll give the other one to crazy chimp.and the last one no idea.bought 3 cos it was like cheaper.but it cost me 5 bucks.new lesson=chocoholics need to have money.ok then i bought dinner for mum and then we went back hoome.in the train my arm started swelling.i got off atr lakeside and walked ome to loose my fats and my arm swelled even more to like twice its size like a puffer fish and it was so so so painful i could faint any moment.i dragged myself back home and then off to the docs myself.my mum i think didnt care didnt know.whatever.im responsible for myself.and then the doc saw me immediately and said blood poisoning.you poked yourself on something didnt you.and i told him the whole story all over AGAIN.
okay then he poked a whole in my arm and squeezed out quite alot of blood.i HAD and was unwillingly FORCED to take the iron pills for blood and then he injected me with the anti-dunno what to get rid of the iron?rust?whatever the nail did to me.it was horrible and i was tearing the whole time.yucks.i'll hate science prac FOREVER.anyway that was it.i came home got screamed at b my mum.she scolded me with all the vulgar words.demoralised me and kicked my ass.yeah its all MY fault.then i had tuition and bla bla.that was it.i still have to do the washing for the family.household chores.clean this clean that.guess what.cann my CINDERELLA THE UGLY WHORE.

2006-09-13T05:21:00.000-07:00

oh yeah baby.the hols are over and now back to school?like what the hell.exams are so near.anyway these few days,i think they suck really bad.so much goddamn tuition and what shit.and ballet!urghh.sucks the life outta me.and i hate school.it sucks so bad.so many things to say with so little time.so i aint gonna write much.but stay happy people.im such a fucking fat whore.

2006-08-27T08:08:00.000-07:00

im such a fucking useless leader.e teachers day rehearsel on fri was a complete mess up.it was so darn messy at the beginnning la.so many people and i had so much problem getting their attention.and then they started off with dearest tiqa'a beautiful video.and then wht the hell happened to the curtains?!?and then my dramam people were so soft.what happened to the mike!!urghh it wasnt their fault,they were just this sweet group trying their best.,thanks guys!
and then e band and griups were great!my juniors sang beautifully.great jod sweeties!jia you.
and then e solo group,again what happened to the mike!!
whatever it was im a darn useless infertile who cant get anything settled properly.i bet the teachers were disappointed oin me.
whatever it is,i hope tues goes better than fri,it it deosnt i swear i'll kill myself.
oh and im so darn proud of the prefects who came back on sat to complete everything!1they actually LEARNT the whole dance!!!yay!!!so so so happy.i hope everything goes okay,we still have the perty to plan for the e teachers.so many things to do.ENOUGH.

what the hell.

2006-08-27T07:54:00.002-07:00

what the hell is wrong with me la?im such an insignificant piece of shit la okay?i cant do anything right in my life.had the teachers day rehearsel on fri.and gawd,was it so shitty and messed up.i dont know what kind of a leader i am.i couldnt like get anything to work properly.first it was so darn messy the whole hall.the mikes weren't working,my drama people were so soft and urghh!i dunno la.it wasnt their fault.they're a cool bunch of sec one's trying their best.
then e slide show dearest tiqa did.what the hell happened there?urghh.who;s that who keeps on moving the curtains and what not.then the band,they were okay la i guess.
solo was okay too,just that the mikes again?!?whats wrong!
the groups,like wow.the dances were superb.very very very high standard.my juniors did a good job with their song too.jia you sweeties!!
and evdrything just happened la okay!i was so bloody useless.standing there like some bloody infertile.
good job prefects,u guys were superb!i think the teachers were disappointed.oh and where were all the class reps!!!
im so frreaking stressed up man.we still have the party to plan!ENOUGH.
e one on tues had better go better or i'll kill myself i tell you.
but im so darn proud of all the prefects who came on sat to complete the whole thing!they actually learnt the dance!!!im so so so happy.=)
yeah so thats abt it.i hope we do okay.

what the hell.

2006-08-27T07:54:00.001-07:00

what the hell.

2006-08-27T07:54:00.000-07:00

fuck you.

2006-08-23T03:30:00.000-07:00

oh god dammit.im so freaking stressed up la.bloody teachers day.cooperate with me wont u?why am i doing everything with an unwilling lot.kill me and send me to hell.dammit.

what.

2006-08-22T06:39:00.000-07:00

i think this blog was officially DEAD man.yeah just dead.man its been like 3 months since i blogged,and now im ack.yes yes,poke my eyes out for not updating it.ahha.
wow geez.things been happening so fast i feel the worlds being flung at me all at one go.
been so busy with teachers day stuff,i hope it really turns out good and successfull.sleeping at 4 am in the morning just to complete proposals and last minute stuff.IT BETTER TURN OUT GOOD MAN.=)
yup.been feeling like a piece of old shit again.its not good trusting people cos when u do,they just take your heart,mess it up and rip it to pieces before giving it back to you and telling you to mend it yourself.now isn't that nice.i just totally enjoy that so much.i trusted you woman.you promised.but i suppose all tht never meant anything to you.and you call yourself my friend.u're kidding me.
and who's mama squid?who the hell's that.you should try watching the'break-up'.i feel JUST like that.dont i mean anything to you anymore? you make me sick.
bullshit.

yippee

2006-06-01T07:54:00.000-07:00

aloha!yay the hols are here..how super cool is that?im starting skating again under rasul and hopefully not stopping ANYMORE!haha.carrying on from gamma and alllll the way up babe!
hmm just got my new skating costume,this ugly wugly bluish thing.yucks.aiya,but no choice right?hehe.
am at camp at nan hua now.its so bloody tiring i tell you..i feel like a super dead and lethargic sotong.yup.true blue lazy sotong.haha.now doesnt that sound familier huh mama squid?
i tell you..feel super sad and spastic nowadays..i so darn miss my friends and teachers at school.my wonderful family besides the born to be with type.i miss mama squid and her super cute doopy face she gives me everytime she tells me im super blur la..love ya mummy!
what else is there?oh ya.chem remedial next wednesday.TWO hours la!how much mole concept can you like get into your head in one day?i know my stoopid brain can only get a wee bit in.im just HOPELESS IN maths,maths and more maths!
anyway.ive gtg.ciao people!happy hols!=)

yippee!

2006-05-16T08:14:00.000-07:00

yippee ya ya yipee yippee ya!!!
yoohhooo!
finally..my long awaited freedom.now doesnt that sound nice?exams are finally over..hell yeah baby!im a free woman now.don tell me what the hell i've got to do.ive done me bit and now its time for pure bliss.
yes yes,i must learn to relax more..think im going to get hypertension,oh but who cares,im only young once.make good use of that!
ooh..i cant wait for the hols..i want to party the night away..skate skate skate till i drop!start working my lazy ass..yes im getting fat.
oh but when was i not fat?haha.
i think im psychotic,brain dead.and i feel stupid,and like a useless lump of fat hanging in the cupboard gathering dust.moss maybe..
yeah i know shit about life and god knows what.
oh geez.see im so negative..wan xuan will say.good thingss don think,go and think abt the bad thins..hiyo''maa-dum''.haha.your fav quote!!hoh?
i don think im going to get A SINGLE A1 for the mid years..oh but i forgot,i dont care anyway..
haha
life is good.i think im mad..
anyhoo.enough of this crapping.bye everyone.take care!love ya guys!

please.why u doing this to me?

2006-04-28T04:21:00.000-07:00

i feel horrible.again.
everything in my god damn life isnt working out again.and each and every day i wake up with that horrible attitude that my day's gonna be real sucky.i hate school,home and everywhere i go..im beginning to think its not so much the people or where i am,i think i just hate myself for being in the way of everything.
the mid year's year but oh who the hell cares anyway.i dont.im failing no matter what i do,so whats the point huh?
today was on of the most horrible days of my life,so many people were hurt and cried,i ended up doing it myself.
god,im asking you,what on earth are you doing to me?u always seem to have a plan behind everything,whast it this time?i cant see what u're trying to do.u're trying to teach me responsibility?sacrifice?perseverance?whats it all got to do with ervything u;re doing to me.u're taking mum away,and with her goes everything i have and look for in life.im just praying fot a miracle.and if that doesnt happen,i dont know how to believe in anymore.
show me something good for once,and let me still see thats there's something worth living for.

2006-04-23T04:48:00.000-07:00

how much can one person take sometimes i ask myself.im sick of hearing the damn word cancer.im sick of being screamed at for everything that she cant take.for everything goddamn thing that goes wrong in her life.yeah maybe u're sick and all.i get that point.but not every damn thing is my fault.its not my fault the dogs poop everywhere in the house.its not my fault i cant wash the dishes or clean the house.its not my fault i cant come home early after school.its not my fault i cant do maths.damn this life.why cant you get it that im not perfect.why cant you get it that i want to have my life.its not that i dont care,its that i cant take it everything at one go.is that so hard to understand.i might as well become an unpaid servant at home.how's that sound?then at least you dont have to care about me anymore like you say,you dont have to pay for my tuition fees,for my pocket money,i can just be someone you need to use. god dammit. IM sick of this.=(

arghh..i cant keep up .

2006-04-22T05:31:00.000-07:00

oh mummmy!!!
i need vodka with sprite and peach to slow my life down.eww,its already mid year,and the horrriiddd exams are gonna be here in 1 week.and im absolutely lost.wats happening in school?where did the 12 hour school days go to?they're all like..gone!
im burrying my head in books the whole time and yet i dont understand a damn thing.urghh..
earth day singing went okay la hoh?i think it did.hha.just had our treat with miss lee,very very yummy fish and chips but i had to stuff my face with food.the rest were just like okay.like its NO fair man!im always the slow one when it comes to food.hrmphh.haha
besides that things are great i'll live and soon the examn are gonna be over.how super nice huh?
see ya!

broken inside

2006-03-28T05:58:00.000-08:00

i think life's been really hard and awful lately.i feel im bullshittin my life away still.emcee's quite okay with miss lee la..got to admit miss lee's becoming quite mummyish.haha
she feeds us everyday.we're sure to get fat.i think i am.some fat rat with a huge arse.hmm how bout that?
im so rotten i tell you.my language is terrible.''all so unbecoming of a young lady'' as miss lee would put it.hha yes.influenced by her.man speech day's in what..2 days time,and i havent memorised my script!arghh!im going to sink my head into it soon.yes.must do a good job,retire from it elegantly.no screwing it up.enough of screwing up.i've done too much screwing this time.what not.
anyway feel like being happy,hmm think im treat myself to sleep.yes dead tired.see ya guys soon!

bliss!

2006-03-08T07:19:00.000-08:00

ahh.bliss!pure bliss.only 2 more weeks to the hols.yippee!life is good,isnt it?=)
cant wait for this term to be over,ive been bull-shittin ard the whole time,and next term its time to work my lazy ass.hehe.
lit lessons have been way cool this whole time.great movies.on love,passion,u name it.u have it.plus air-con to go along.add in popcorn and apple chips and we;ll have a per-fec-tto setting for the movies!(i think we'll be the noisiest crowd there tho..haha)
meet the parents sessions are coming soon and i know my mum's gonna have loads of crap to talk abt to the teachers.dont i juuusssttt look forward to it.bleugh.it'll be the death of me i promise you.hell yeah!
only consolation i have,my big bro's coming tomorrow!!super doobee doo!!!i'll have my big teddy to hug,all the way from india!i mean,how cool is that?!=D
i think im falling for olive green,and polka dots.ok i've got wierd taste.the best people in my life have alreay told me that.=p
im the polka-dotty green monster to them.eh correct pei ling?ahha.but u still love me jie!i know you do!heehee.im very thick skined.yes ive been told that too.hah!!
anyway.got to run!toodles people!

god.

2006-03-06T06:00:00.000-08:00

gawd!!just the starting of the week and already i want it to end.the lessons this weeks are absolutely horrible.it sucks totally.i have really got to start bucking up on my subjecxts.my marks have thoroughly shocked me this term.not a single A i think.atrocious.shameful.
this holidays are going to be all about working hard to improve.must do better next term.
went to this reflexology place at beauty world just now and gosh!was it paaainnnfuull!they massaged my wrist for the first time teling me that i had hurt my vein and dammit it hurt so so so bad i started crying.hahaha.can u imagine?=p
so there goes tomorrow with an ugly bandage.urghh!anyway i better stop complaining!haha.ciao!

piss off.

2006-03-02T04:28:00.000-08:00

i think im really pessimistic.i really am arent i?some girl thats full of cock and shit.whats with me man?today was a really terrible day.suffered for another 3 hours with that sickening instructor.he so totally pisses me off.whats with all the positioning?how is it people who deserve to be in the front arent givin it,and those that dont are given it.why cant everyone be showcased with their very own solo part.its a filthy thing to only showcase one person's ''fantastic movements''.no one's that good.and whats with all the shouting and ranting in our ears?we can perfectly well hear you!theres no need to shout!
im beginning to think im really useless in evrything.studies,dance?what else is there.
tomorrow's fri,end to another horrible week,looking forward to it ending.and prefects meeting tomorrow.sigh.that too.pain to go through.i wish i could just.quit!
i've got to admitthe nly things that are pushing me on are my really adorable friends in school..geez.without them i wouldnt be anywhere.
arhh!gtg and do my homeork,n there goes another million brain cells right?hha.cheers.

finally.

2006-03-01T07:05:00.000-08:00

hehe.finally.im back on my blog!this years been a great year so far..loads of ups and downs,but its been good.way better than last year.made a whole lot of great friends.pei ling and kah yan.great people who've been there when i needed them the most.
its already march.and im a year older..ehh hmm.still very young!=)heehee.my b'dae party this year was absolutely fabulous.the best!so many people came!all the extremely nice and lovely ones!it so made my day.year in fact!
schools okay too.lit's been very very very fun.superb.big mama.what can i say?still the same cool and chirpy woman!fun of energy that infects you!haha.im one of her infected people.totally.
miss lee's cool too!big sis she is.oh well..still not doing well in physics OR maths.chinese too.anything new?!urghh.i've just got to pass my goddamn maths!piece of shit.giving me white hair!buggs me day and night!absolutely disgusting!
dads still been away,for ever so long too!dad,come home soon okay?i love you very very much.so does mum.oh god.
i've really got to do my homework now else i'll get hollered at!hahaha!toodles!

back from india

2005-12-10T21:47:00.000-08:00

i am back from india and it was simply beautiful.despite all the doubts i had abt going there and experiencing their lifestyle,im really glad a made a trip there.hopitality was simple warming and its such a beautiful place with nice people.its a place ill never forget..will talk abt it next time!see ya!

theres got to be more to life

2005-11-24T01:54:00.000-08:00

there's got to be more to life
theres got to be more to life
there's got to be more to life
there's got to be more to life
there's got to be more to life
there's got to be more to life
there's got to be more to life
there's got to be more to life

heloo!!!im back=)

2005-11-22T04:37:00.000-08:00

hehe.finally reinstalled this blog of mine.did it mostly by myself too!heeheehee.great achievement for a computer jerk like me.
yeah.its already the last few days of nov and soon a brand new year will begin all too soon!this years been great,ive learnt many lessons that have taught me new things,lessons i will keep for life,my classmates have been the ones going through everything with me these 2 years and its gonna be real sad seeing us all go into different classes.sigh.life's never fair.but all the same many happy memories!!
cant wait to meet my new classmates,gonna be so much fun!hope its gonna start out good.been helping mum out with all the concert stuff lately..quite fun!!small little children!ha!.x)yeah soon's the class chalet too!!yippee!last moments of fun to remember with 2e.and of course hope india's going to be loads of fun too!
anyway to all my forends out there!thanks for the wonderful times we've shared,friends like all of you are hard to come by!!god bless and toodles!

yeah

2005-11-20T20:53:00.000-08:00

just trying it out